Erin’s finger

A week ago yesterday, Erin got her finger caught in the van door. I was just finishing up bible study and had just gotten the kids from the childcare. We were walking outside and it was freezing. The car had frozen.  While walking to the car, I tried to open the doors with he button on the keys, but it wouldn’t open. When we got to the car it opened just a little bit so she put her hand at the opening and then it shut back closed. I kept hitting the button to try and open it and get her fingers out.  Finally she got them out and was screaming. I couldn’t see it that well so I got everyone in the car. I had to climb into the front seat to turn the light on so I could take a better look. I was afraid it was broken how bruised it was. That’s when I noticed the blood. I grabbed some napkins from the car and wrapped her finger in it. Then I called Chris and told him to go straight to the ER where I would meet him. I had to drive there slowly because the weather (sleet), but we made it right after chris did. She was at the ER til past midnight with Chris. While I took the boys home for the night.   It was a scary light where we asked around for prayers that it not be broken. Luckily she didn’t need stitches either. They just used glue. This is a picture from today:

Valentine’s Day

Yesterday was Valentine’s Day. And I would have posted then but my battery died. Oh well. It was a fun and busy day. John and I spent the morning with nana and had lots of fun playing with her. While they napped I was able to go to Paul and then Erin’s party.  They handed out the valentines I spent all night finishing up. They were cute heart shaped crayons that I made using the crayon factory.



 I made them over the course of a month whenever I had the chance. And then the machine broke after just a few so I had to get another and hope it lasted longer. It did. 

Anyway. The parties were fun. Then we came home and I made Mac and cheese and chicken. Then Erin and I rushed off to Girl Scouts while the boys stayed with nana. We came home to her with a rose and some chocolate. I came home to a similar box of chocolate and gave a matching one to Chris. Overall busy but good day. 

Erin’s Barbie birthday

We had a really cool party at the Artisan down on Main Street Collinsville where the kiddos got to paint Barbie furniture (couches & coffee tables) for the activity. 








 It was nice and low key. We had chips and cake 
 And punch for snack and just a few friends and family as guests.
 It was a nice intimate yet low key affair. Erin got some stuff for her desks, doll outfits, dolls, a dog set, and shopkins. She was really greatful for all the gifts. 

Baby's First Bath

Paul had his first bath at home today (June ?, not the date of the post). Erin even helped out! It was very sweet of her but it meant we had to be extra attentive. I was so preoccupied that I didn't get the camera out! I'm sorry, Paul, it was a momentous event I was unable to document properly. I was able to get a few pictures after while you lay drying in my arms. The one below was the best.

It was pretty good as far as infant baths go. He screamed a little. We had to use soaked washcloths because the shower bit wasn't working. Erin helped out with a washcloth by dripping water over him. There were a couple times she got close to and on his face but it was still all good.

Sleep?

Erin has been so worn out these last couple of days that she's sleeping well into 8:30. Chris says this is a good thing for me because I can sleep a bit longer, too. But I have to say that's only true if both of them stay asleep during that time. Paul doesn't agree with his dad and likes to be wide eyed awake in the mornings after his morning pooh. And until that point in time he's only "asleep" in the sense that his eyes are closed because he starts kicking and grunting loudly way before that point.
But it's okay. I've been fortunate enough to get at least a couple hours sleep during the day either during Erin's nap time or while she is with someone.

Toddler troubles

So since the c-section I haven't been allowed/able to lift Erin. This has made it especially difficult due to her timing. She has started the "testing phase", where she is constantly questioning her and our limits. This seems like it would be a hard phase to deal with anyway (not to mention exhausting). But since I am limited in what I do it seems even harder. I know I'm doing okay with it, but just barely. I'm so tired in the first place that I get frustrated easier. I know she's still a baby, sort of (toddlers are babies, right?), but it still irks me when she doesn't listen... Which seems to be a lot. But I know as I get better so will these parenting skills. I'm sure if she knew the word she'd call me a bitch sometimes, which I'm actually fine with.
But I was sitting there with Paul as dada gave Erin her bath and thought, honestly thought about it for the first time in a long time, about how it would be with my MS. It's not something I keen on thinking about but it sort of hit me: this is probably what it would be like with a flare up.. On a good day, which makes me worry just a bit. But that is something I will deal with when it gets there.

Bassinet babies

So Chris and I picked up this $300 white wicker Pottery Barn bassinet at jbf for $150 right before Erin was born. At first we were apprehensive about the buy, a bit worried we had spent that much on an item we weren't even sure we'd ever use.
But since then Erin slept in it for months in our room, Brooklyn did the same at the Wards, and now we are repeating the process with Paul.
We had it out in the living room and were going to wheel it into the bedroom each night. But right now I'm sleeping on the recliners in the living room, so he stays right there with me. Once I feel good enough to "get out of bed" (quite literally; it's the bending and pushing myself from a full laying position, which is why the recliners are nice) both of us will move into the bedroom where he will stay until he grows out of it or hits 3 months, whichever comes first.
But I think it's really cool that this buy, that we questioned, is quickly becoming a family heirloom.

Little Miss Fussy-Butt

Today she was moody, yesterday she was fussy and she's been all over trying and pushing boundaries... all part of growing up.
Yesterday was just another Sunday that was difficult. I don't know why it's Sundays, but those are usually her worst days. Maybe we just do too much the week before. But yesterday was another one of those days. I thought it'd be good, but she's teething so is fussy. I had to keep telling her no, which made her throw fits and cry... and I just don't know what to do when she does that. It makes me feel helpless. I couldn't find my car keys, or purse, and was trying to get ready for church. Erin wouldn't let me change her dirty diaper, or change her outfit (which turned out to be too small so I had to chase her around and change her outfit again!). Then when I put the dogs away, she went in and let them out and got mad when I wouldn't let her and had to physically take her out of the room. She put stuff in the tub and turned on the water (in my bathroom) as well as put her hands in a toilet to retrieve some toys she just dropped in. When I picked her up to wash her hands she got mad and crying. I got so much snot on my sunday clothes... but I was worried when I was washing her hands that I was hurting her because I had to push her into the sink to hold her up (I only have so many hands). I was worried about her stomach. Not a good morning. I felt rushed and frustrated. But was able to keep my cool through most of it (except in finding my purse... didn't find it until today).
But like I said, it wasn't a day I couldn't handle, which made it a good day. I jsut have to remember, she's just a baby and it's not her fault. This is a learning experience for her and it's better that she learn things she's not supposed to do now rather than when she's older. (I had to deal with this a little today with the dog food and electrical outlets). It's hard to keep that in mind and know what to do. I slap away her hand and she just keeps going back no matter how often I say no she just doesn't listen. She doesn't even acknowledge me when I say her name to get her attention. I just need to remember it's nothing personal, she's learning and I love her. Then when she reacts negatively to my repremands (her crying fits) I just have to walk away. I can't let that affect me either. Just make sure she's away from the bad things and go away until she calms down. I can explain it to her why, but I can't do what I want to (pick her up and comfort her crying) because that's negative reinforncement of what I want to teach.
I'm not saying that she shouldn't be held when she cries, on the contrary that's the first thing I want to do and often do do. When she gets hurt or scared or is tired and just needs to cry, I hold her and comfort her (now I immitate her saying "rock the baby" as I rock her in my arms). But I can't do that when she's crying because she's mad she can't do something she wants to that I don't want her to do. It's not fair to her to let her think that just because I tell her something "no"-wise doesn't mean she can't get out of it if she cries. I can't let in to my first reactions... and that's hard with a crying baby that I love. I do feel bad for her, but I know she's got to learn. I never understood that train of thought until I had a child. I just hope I can stay calm and keep my cool through this learning phase. Erin, I love you, you are so smart, I know you will learn quickly and easily. Just be patient with mama.

Erin Teething

So it feels like Erin's been teething for the last few months, because every time she throws a fit, sleeps too long, has a fever, gets off in any way that is the excuse: "Oh, don't worry. She's just teething." seems to explain everything.
And as true as it may be, it's just... when will it end? I don't know why but when she started teething I just assumed it would be those first few, and then there'd be a break before the next few came in... and then another break... and then some more and another break.
I don't know why I'd assume something like that. I didn't really assume it, but I didn't really think otherwise. I didn't think that she would just KEEP teething. I don't know why I wouldn't, it makes logical sense, but it just didn't really hit me. Just one of those things.
She's getting her back molars in right now, and I've never seen her go at stuff chewing like she has been. I thought she'd chew through her teethers! She usually doesn't like the frozen ones, but she has gone for them like nothing else these last few days.

Dollie Go Night-Night

My daughter did the cutest thing tonight! So I've had a rough time with her today, and luckily Gammy was able to take her for a bit. I'm just so worn out for some reason and I think Erin is grumpy and was being a bit of a pill today (But that's another blog insert).
Anyway, back on subject of cuteness! So it's bedtime and we (Chris, Erin, and I) go through our nighttime routine, minus the bath part because it was late and we had been out. So we changed her clothes, said our prayers, and gave her her medicine. Then it was time to lay her down. She still seemed quite awake, so I brought her her dollie and she held onto it tightly as we laid her down. Then she immediately sat up when she hit the bed, and I thought "Oh, great. Now she's gonna start crying and everything." But she didn't, she just grabbed her little pooh-bear-blankie-thing and started covering up her dollie. Then I thought she was going to stay seated but when I reached for her she laid down with dollie (covered with blankie) tightly in her arms. It was so sweet! I almost cried then and there. It brightened my day and reminded me of the good things. It is a great memory I will cherish (and look forward to her repeating again!).

Grumpy Girl

Today was a bit rough. Erin's being more clingy than normal, I think it's because the daycare stuff. Ever since I started her in daycare she's become really hard to leave with strangers. Not necessarily a bad thing, but I wouldn't leave her with strangers anyway. She has started crying really hard and clinging onto me when I try and hand her over. The first day of daycare she didn't, she willingly went to the lady there, but since then it's been harder. She's gotten to where, after I leave her and they've finally distracted her enough that she quits crying, anytime someone enters the room... anyone entering... if it's not me she starts her hysterics again. It's very bothersome/worrysome. I know it's just a phase, but it's really hard to deal with when I need to leave her (like church) with someone. I don't know how to fix this. She sort of went through a similar phase when she was 7 months, but it wasn't this bad, and it got fixed after a while. But now... now it's crazy. It's exhausting.
And so I had to leave her today at church at the nursery, which she's gone to plenty of times before and been fine. And I thought she'd be okay (because she seems better with people she knows, and she knows them sort of). When I was checking her in she even started walking off to go in, but she had a hold of my finger, so I couldn't let her in because I wasn't done checking her in. By the time I was done the girl tried to take her and Erin freaked out. It was aweful! I spent most of church praying about her. I thought it was all under control until the last five minutes. I recieved a text saying that Erin needed me. Before church I had been looking forward to the idea that I could get a chocolate chocolate-chip muffin there after service for breakfast. I was really looking forward to it. But when I got to Erin she was inconsolable, so I just took her and headed home. We did stop by McD's to see Chris and grab some food. Fries made the tears go away for a little bit. And when we got home she took her nap.
I thought the fits would be done when she awoke, and I knew Patty was coming to get her in a little while after she got up. So I put in one of her Classical Baby DVDs and she immediately was mezmerized ( for that whole "I'm awake but not really ready to move" phase these DVDs are great). She sat down right in front of the TV, which is a bit close for me (I realize TVs have changed over the years, but I always remember hearing you shouldn't sit closer than 4 feet for your eyes' sake, so I still try to keep to that and have been trying to get Erin to follow it too). So I asked her to come sit with me a few feet away. She just ignored my requests. When I reached out for her and took hold to pull her back to me she freaked out: she flailed her arms, arched her back, started crying and yelling. It was aweful. I felt horible. All I wanted to do was sit with her in my lap, or at least beside me, and I couldn't. Every time I even touched her she started again. I finally just grabbed her and held onto her while she screamed and cried and flailed about. I tried to explain to her that we could watch it and that I just wanted to hold her, but I know she doesn't understand that quite yet. I started crying. All I wanted to do was hold my baby and it seemed she hated me when I touched her. We cried together for a little while and she finally realized I wasn't going to take her away, but she stayed stiff while watching the dvd. I felt so bad.
I've got to figure out how to make her less grumpy.
This morning she was very "dizzy" it seemed, so I'm taking her for a check tomorrow because I'm worried that her ear infection has gotten worse. She's not contagious, I know that much. No fever and her caugh is almost gone. She's recovering her voice even. But she was very off-balance today. She fell a couple of times when she shouldn't have and hit her head. Once when she was standing and holding onto something. She didn't slip or trip or anything, just "wham!" fell and hit her head. So that and the grumpiness makes me a bit worried. It's not that she's sick, she's just not acting herself, so I'm going to go have it checked.

Erin's Birthday coming soon!!!

I'm so excited for Erin's first birthday! It's such an eventful milestone in her life, and mine. I love that I get to celebrate my little girl and show off how talented she is with her many achievements.
I hope we get the rest of her decorations in spite of the snow. We should, and if we don't I've got back-up! :)

Erin Walks!

Erin has lately been taking a few steps at a time, but tonight at Small Group she walked all the way across the kitchen! It was amazing!!!

Erin's First Steps

Today Erin walked a couple of feet (at least 3 steps, closer to 5) today! It was from one of her toys to me, with some prompting. Then she did it later between Chris and I. It's so great seeing her reach these milestones! It's sad too because I know that she's growing up so quickly. But it's so great.

One Month Countdown

One more month until Erin turns 1 year old! I've got to start planning! I think I'm going to go with the Alice In Wonderland Theme. I've been doing some research online and have some cute ideas.

Erin's First Step

Erin took her first step on her own today! It was so magical! Just one little step on her own before falling down on her butt, but it was wonderful to watch. Chris and I try to get her to walk between our arms without support. She's doing so well, and growing up so quickly!