Checking in

Let me just say, and please excuse my language, if you are going to take one (or both) of my children you'd better damn well answer my calls! My biggest fear is loosing them so when you don't answer my texts or phone calls I get anxious and start to worry. This is even more true when you repeatedly don't answer me... Especially I'd you are going a long distance or time I need those check-ins to happen. I understand people can't always get to their phone immediately. But when you are watching someone else's child be sure and call back as soon as you see the call/text.
For repeat offenders I will be forced to not allow this situation to have the possibility of arising again so that I won't have to worry about it. I do appreciate your willingness to watch them even while you are busy, but i cant emotionally deal with it right now. Thank you.

Growing up

More of a quick note but: my little buby is growing too fast! He's already 3 weeks old! Where has the time gone? It does not seem like just yesterday but it does seem like we've got a rhythm going. I don't want him to grow any more (says my mommy voice because the rest of me does so that he can become the person he's supposed to). It seems like this is the way it should be, not him reaching milestones, walking, and ultimately leaving the nest (yes, more mommy voice)! *sniff, sniff*

Little Miss Fussy-Butt

Today she was moody, yesterday she was fussy and she's been all over trying and pushing boundaries... all part of growing up.
Yesterday was just another Sunday that was difficult. I don't know why it's Sundays, but those are usually her worst days. Maybe we just do too much the week before. But yesterday was another one of those days. I thought it'd be good, but she's teething so is fussy. I had to keep telling her no, which made her throw fits and cry... and I just don't know what to do when she does that. It makes me feel helpless. I couldn't find my car keys, or purse, and was trying to get ready for church. Erin wouldn't let me change her dirty diaper, or change her outfit (which turned out to be too small so I had to chase her around and change her outfit again!). Then when I put the dogs away, she went in and let them out and got mad when I wouldn't let her and had to physically take her out of the room. She put stuff in the tub and turned on the water (in my bathroom) as well as put her hands in a toilet to retrieve some toys she just dropped in. When I picked her up to wash her hands she got mad and crying. I got so much snot on my sunday clothes... but I was worried when I was washing her hands that I was hurting her because I had to push her into the sink to hold her up (I only have so many hands). I was worried about her stomach. Not a good morning. I felt rushed and frustrated. But was able to keep my cool through most of it (except in finding my purse... didn't find it until today).
But like I said, it wasn't a day I couldn't handle, which made it a good day. I jsut have to remember, she's just a baby and it's not her fault. This is a learning experience for her and it's better that she learn things she's not supposed to do now rather than when she's older. (I had to deal with this a little today with the dog food and electrical outlets). It's hard to keep that in mind and know what to do. I slap away her hand and she just keeps going back no matter how often I say no she just doesn't listen. She doesn't even acknowledge me when I say her name to get her attention. I just need to remember it's nothing personal, she's learning and I love her. Then when she reacts negatively to my repremands (her crying fits) I just have to walk away. I can't let that affect me either. Just make sure she's away from the bad things and go away until she calms down. I can explain it to her why, but I can't do what I want to (pick her up and comfort her crying) because that's negative reinforncement of what I want to teach.
I'm not saying that she shouldn't be held when she cries, on the contrary that's the first thing I want to do and often do do. When she gets hurt or scared or is tired and just needs to cry, I hold her and comfort her (now I immitate her saying "rock the baby" as I rock her in my arms). But I can't do that when she's crying because she's mad she can't do something she wants to that I don't want her to do. It's not fair to her to let her think that just because I tell her something "no"-wise doesn't mean she can't get out of it if she cries. I can't let in to my first reactions... and that's hard with a crying baby that I love. I do feel bad for her, but I know she's got to learn. I never understood that train of thought until I had a child. I just hope I can stay calm and keep my cool through this learning phase. Erin, I love you, you are so smart, I know you will learn quickly and easily. Just be patient with mama.

PPD getting better

It doesn't bother me when people that have never had kids say that they don't understand how someone could shake a baby... but it does bother me when a parent says it. It bothers me because I found it hard sometimes when I would get frustrated. Please understand how hard that is to say. I love Erin soooo much! But I'd be tired (and in pain sometimes) and she'd be so tired she'd be crying so hard and wouldn't go to sleep... and when they tell you to gently shake/rock the baby to sooth her... I can see how it could easily get out of hand. I never let it, but I can see how it happens.

Anyway, I tried to explain to someone the other day how easy it would be, and they were adimant about how they felt. I felt soooo bad. I felt like the worst person ever. I thought people knew how it felt that had kids.

Today it didn't bother me... which was a nice surprise. It bothered me, but it didn't bother me like that. I wanted to cry with her, because I felt bad for how she was feeling. I felt empathetic instead of frustrated... which was a very nice change. A releif, to say the least.

PPD on Meds

So I'm on meds now, my 3rd day. Just Welbutrion. I'm a little worried about how it'll affect Erin. I'm doing better, but, you know, since I've had it around me I've been doing better.

The only problem is my milk supply... it is extremely low! It hurts so much when she gets to the end of her feeding. Almost like a needle. I'm trying to be good and drink and eat more, but it's really hard. It's hard to remember, and it's hard to get time sometimes to do anything, let alone eat. I don't know. I know my doctor (Sorenson) reccomended Zoloft because it has little/no effect on her. Welbutron's not supposed to be bad for her, but I'm supposed to watch her attitude (if she becomes docile, non attentive, and whatnot). I didn't know that until today, oye. I'm a bit worried. I need to tell her doctor (first thing tomorrow).

---

Sometimes, when Chris puts her to sleep and she's crying so hard and then she suddenly stops... it scares me. Because I know how frustraiting it is, and I know how tightly he holds her. I worry. I get scared.

---

Life is getting better. I'm just worried... and low.

I did get a sudden high, but now I've leveled off, still in a funk... but not as dangerous. Last tuesday I still wanted to run away. I fought the urge badly over a couple of days but now I'm better. I've been talking things over with Chris a lot more. And things are getting better with communication.

PPD

Okay, so it's been hitting me hard this week. There are times when I just want to scream and yell at Erin to shut up! Times when she's so tired (and I'm so tired) that she won't go to sleep and she just cries so hard. It scares me what I will/can/do do. I try not to think about it, I try not to act on things... but it's hard. I love her so much, but I get so frustrated. I don't know how to explain it, because I'm trying not to think about it.

It started last Thursday and has lasted through this week. It got so bad that by Sunday I was ready to just hand her over to whomever. I just wanted to drop her off and never come back. Monday I went to see Dr. Janet. I told her my feelings. oye. It's hard. I've calmed down but I still... oye.

And being depressed I haven't eaten as well as I should or drank as much as I should, and it was affecting my milk supply. I told Chris my milk was low and it was hurting to nurse her. He made me feel so guilty. It's not like I knew what I was doing! I don't want to hurt her... and I didn't mean to if I did. And I hate how Chris made me feel about the low milk. I didn't realize I wasn't eating or drinking enough until today. I mean, I was depressed! I didn't notice. So now I have to really watch it.

LBG's Big Day

Well, LBG's big due date has come and gone, and now it's the date of induction. I'm so very nervous and scared. I cried last night for a good little while while Chris comforted me. Stupid hormones. It's just such a scary thing. I mean, it's not. A lot of people go through it, and over half of all pregnancies go past the EDD. But it scares me. I don't know why. But part of me already feels like a failure as a mother. I know it's silly and sad that I think this, and it's only a very small part of the thoughts that creep into my head. I know it's fully not justified in thinking and that I'll be a damn good mom, but that doesn't stop the thought from approaching. It makes me cry every time. And I know this is not my fault, I know that it's no one's fault. It's just God's will, and there is a reason for it. I'm just so scared.
It's odd, I think I was less scared thinking that I'd just randomly go into labor. It's odd that the controled way is what scares me. I think it's because I am actually thinking about the process. My mind goes through the steps of what will happen, rather than just going "and I could just go into labor at any time" and not think about what the steps are. When I was watching for the signs of labor I had to keep my mind there, in the present, in case I missed a sign. But now, I have time to think... and that's never a good idea.
I'm fine, and please don't worry. Just keep me in your prayers. I know God will give me the strength to get through this, and that He'd never give me anything I can't handle. I'm just scared is all, and I wanted to note the feelings for myself for later reference. So if I start crying in your presence, please understand: it's not you, and I know I shouldn't be worried. I'm just scared. And I know the outcome will be such a great joy it will overwhelm these feelings I have right now. I think the worst part right now is the waiting. But LBG will come and all will be good.

Headaches and Head Aches

Right now I'm debating weither or not to take Tylenol or Tylenol Sinus. I've got a headache that's starting to be piercing.
Today has been busy. We had an early day at the doctors and I didn't sleep that well last night. So it's been considerably long. We walked around a lot of places, Target really pissed me off/annoyed me today. But we got that all sorted out, glad Chris was there. We walked around the super Target in Tulsa, Woodland Hills Mall, and Baby Depot. So I've done a lot of walking. And driving over the snowy spots has been bumpy driving.
Yesterday I sortof did pre-labor stuff, like ride on a bumpy road, walk around (with Mom we walked around Hobby Lobby a bunch), and ate some slightly spicy food (do biscuts and gravy count?). Oh, also I baked... so I did a bit of nesting.
But anyway, today has been a long day, and I've got a major headache. that feels like pierces in my head.
But no baby today. Chris is getting anxious/excited. But yesterday brought about lots of worrry to me. I mean... this is really happening. REALLY happening. It's such an overwhelming feeling. I mean, and not knowing when it's going to happen, how much it's going to hurt, or anything! It's so scarry! I am truely scared, and I know I have to just give it into God's hands. But it truely worries me. I mean, what is this labor thing?! How am I supposed to deal with it? What is it going to be like? I'm so scared about the whole thing... not knowing is scary.
Chris keeps saying that it's all worth it, and it is... but it's just going to be more worrying: I mean, what's going to happen when she's older/outside of my protection?
Anyway, I just worry a lot, I know. But with pregnancy and labor being so close I'm extra emotional. Chris is being so good about everything. He's good at comforting me.

Where's my time?

Sometimes I feel like a character on one of those cop shows and that I should be wearing an ankle bracelet. Since Chris has made the request that I no longer drive, I feel trapped sometimes. Which is weird, since I go out almost daily. I just feel I can't do it on my own.
At first I was like "who do you think you are?! Telling me, a wonderfully independent woman, what to do? Telling me I can't drive my own vehicle?!" But the closer I get to the due date, the more I understand. I don't want to be stuck in Tulsa's traffic with contractions going. I know very very few people really have babies on the side of the road in the back of their vehicle (unless you go by movie statistics). But that doesn't stop me from worrying about the actual contractions happening then. I mean, right now I get 1 to 2 contractions a day, but they've started coming at random times (yes, Braxton Hicks). So I don't want one of them to come while I'm driving and take away my concentration.
But all that doesn't stop me from feeling trapped sometimes. I felt so overwhelmed the other day, a couple of days after the shower. I kept looking around the house at what needed (what I wanted) to be done, and realizing I couldn't do it myself. I couldn't lift the boxes, I couldn't bend over to pick up stuff, I couldn't drive anywhere to get away... I felt completely useless... and helpless. It's not a fun feeling and it's hard to grasp sometimes. But I have been blessed to have people come out and help me.
Unfortunately, that's one of the things that made me feel like a prisoner, too. I'm never alone! N-E-V-E-R! Last night was the first time I didn't have a "changing of the guards" and actually had a few hours to myself... of course, I didn't know what to do with myself, but that's besides the point.

Pelvic Push

This past week, I think LBG has dropped into my pelvic region... It's the oddest feeling (I know I've been saying that about a number of things on this blog, but each one really is odd). To best describe it, it's like when you sit down (which is when I'm mainly feeling the pressure) and catch a fat-fold between your leg and stomache. That by itself sounds odd... Okay, if you've got some extra skin, take it and shove it inwards, towards your intestines, while sitting. That's what it feels like.
I worry sometimes that I'm smashing her hand (or worse, her head). But she hasn't done anything to make me move. They say that the baby'll hurt you before you hurt it, so I guess that's a good sign.
It's a very odd feeling having her that far down, especially since my belly is still getting rounder, and not dropping to follow her. It just makes it uncomfortable sometimes to sit. I have to adjust a lot because I'll feel her, mainly on my left side, down there.
I've felt her down there before, but this is more constant. It's not anything to worry about though, the books all say that durring the first pregnancy the baby drops down there up quite a few weeks before the due date. It's second and third pregnancies that it's a sign of labor approaching. So, so far everything is still on track... until my doctor says otherwise. :)

Killer Heartburn!

ATTACK OF THE KILLER HEARTBURN! Oh my goodness it was bad today! I have to remember to eat, because she'll remind me. I think that's why she gets me up at 9 am each morning, in spite of how late I might have stayed up the previous night. She also makes sure I'm drinking enough water, otherwise she'll send her acid bombs my way too.
But this morning was H-O-R-R-I-B-L-E! I skipped out on breakfast at the house so that Chris and I could get it together. But by the time we left the house and were on the way to McDonalds... I thought my throat would never recover! I thought I was going to vomit it was so bad. I think heartburn has been the worst pain so far of the pregnancy.
I mean, most of the time, I'm used to it. It's almost a constant some days. And I pop Tums (which are completely safe) like they're candy (which is apparently completely safe for Tums because they're providing calcium). But this morning that didn't even help. I think it was because I was dehydrated a little and on an empty stomache.
I mean, at night it's hard to avoide because my pre-natal vitamin gives me heartburn sometimes, and if I lay down too soon after eating... that does it too. But today. It hurt soooo much! I was snappy and practically yelling at Chris. But I could barely talk because I didn't want to open my mouth. I could feel the acid in the back of my mouth. The rest of the day I kept spitting to get rid of the mucos that was pooling back there.
So, LBG, I get the point: Eat breakfast weither I feel like it or not, and drink plenty of refreshing liquids.

Getting On My (Sciatic) Nerves

OK, so with MS I've had Sciatica before. But it was always in my left side. I had heat therapy for it and other methods of pain relief even up to going to the midnight ER for steroid shots it. But now...
Sciatic nerve pain (not full on sciatica) has been hitting me to wake me up, and it gets where I can't go back to sleep. I know it's a pregnancy thing at this point. It was, originally, just hitting me in one side at a time. But now it hits one side, stays, and hits the other. So no matter which side I turn to lay on it is there! I do have to say that it is the most annoying thing about the pregnancy so far.
LBG has me on a timer: When she wants me to get up and get moving, she sends the shooting pain through my sciatic nerves and makes it so tossing and turning is useless.
I don't know if it's because I'm in a different bed right now or not (I've been down at Yale for the past few days and the both sides thing has happened every morning). I know I got it at least one side in my normal bed, but I also remember turning over and it being okay. We have the memory foam on the bed at the house. It was always my right side there. I'll keep a mental note and do a status report after I get back to my normal sleeping arrangements (although the more I think about it the more I think it might have started that way, but it was like this before I came down to Yale, too). I mean, she is getting bigger, so it's entirely possible its now in both legs.
And it's not like this is full-on sciatica (like it can get with MS), so far it's just really annoying pain in my... outer thighs (you thought I was going to say butt!). But I know it's along the sciatic nerve because I've dealt with that beast so many times.
It's not LBG's fault, she's just settling into her "final" position. It's just amazing the timing she has. According to her scheduling, she'll start the labor around 9/10 am. We'll see how true that prediction is in a little over a month (OMG! JUST A FEW WEEKS!).
Most people start to feel this paid around the third trimester, but they get it when they're standing or sitting. I do think it's a bit odd that I get it when I lay down, and feel better when I'm up and about. If I'm sitting right after it doesn't go completely away, but it's a very dull sensation that is ignorable. That's what I'm doing now, and I have to concentrate on the feeling to describe it, because it's on it's way out for the day... I hope.
I'm a little worried about it during labor. Is sciatic nerve pain something I need to worry about during labor? Does it rear it's ugly head at that time, or should it be past that point? They say (okay, and you've gotta understand whenever I say "they say" I'm talking about the people from What to Expect) that it'll continue a little past pregnancy as my hips realign themselves.
I always feel like I'm talking about a car when I say realign. But it's true. My hips have been popping more and more these last few weeks. At first it was just getting out of bed, which is understandable given the struggle it can be sometimes with the covers. But now, it's even simply getting out of the car. In fact yesterday, when I was getting out of the car, I had to stop for a second to prevent that from happening because I could feel it press against the sciatic nerve for a moment while it tried. I didn't want double the pain because of that. I mean, my hip popped before I was pregnant quite a bit, too, but now I'm aware of it for different reasons.
Anyway, if you know about sciatic pain and pregnancy, please let me know if it happens during labor.

Pregnant vs MS

Today is the first day during the pregnancy that I've felt like I had MS again. I was tired, and my legs were all tingly for a few hours. Everything felt heavy, and it was hard to do stuff, even decorate the miniature tree we have. I couldn't bring myself to tackle the big one. I resigned myself to taking a nap even. First time in a while I've done that.
But I have to look at not what's happened today, but this past week. It's Thanksgiving week, so of course, it's been busy. (more on Job)
There was one other weird feeling I had today, that I think is pregnancy related, but got me a little worried. On my lower abdomen, close to my navel, I had a sensation of needle pricks. Not one at a time, but a line of a bunch of them. And not pins and needles, or the tingly feeling, but scratchy pointy needles, all at once... in a line. It's still there, it comes and goes now, but it lasted a while. I thought maybe LBG scratched me, because it felt like it was coming from inside. It's got to be one of the odder sensations, and has me a bit worried. But, I'm sure it's nothing. Just wanted to document that it started today, sometime before I took my nap because I remember feeling for it when I laid down and it was still there.
Alright, I should try to get some sleep.

3-D 4-D Imaging Done Today... Kind of

Well, today was a busy day for baby and me, so understandably LBG was tired (despite some devious tricks of my own) by the time the 3-D/4-D ultrasound went on today. I think I put her in a sugar coma. (you can see here her heartrate is still good but slightly elevated)
>

You see, earlier today I had that glucose test, so I had all that sugar this morning, and then I knew that to get her to move I should take some more sugar close to the ultrasound viewing. I packed in the orange juice (the real stuff, not the glucose orange stuff), cinimon roll bites, and ice-cream. Needless to say, I wasn't feeling up to doing much movement after all that stuff hit me today, I can't imagine a little fetus feeling the effects.
Anyway, we went and she was moving somewhat before we got in the room, I could feel her kicks and whatnot, but she was tired out by the time we saw her on the screen.

The images were distorted because her umbilical cord was in front of her face (above you can see the cord in the black & whites). There was a cute moment where she yawned though (below), it was so sweet!

We were able to see/tell some features, but she wouldn't move the cord out of the way.

But the people there were really cool about the whole thing and stopped us after 15 minutes and asked if we'd like to re-schedule for a free re-do. We of course agreed. We'll be doing it again Nov. 11, at 1:30pm, and hopefully she'll be up to it by then. I know I went home and crashed, with a little bit of a ickie feeling to my stomache, I'm sure she felt the same.
I hope you enjoy the pictures of what we did get. At one point, I rolled onto my side and she put her feet above her head... not a feat I look at doing any time soon.

Don't worry too much about the ones we did get, because we will be getting more (and hopefully better ones) soon!

Kicks a Miss

Little baby girl (LBG) worried me today... and last night. It's all good, but I just wanted to document it for myself.
Alright, so last night I ate waaaayy too much, which I didn't think was too much because it was a pretty average sized sinner, but then the desert was a bit big and probably put me over. A ton of sugary goodness, that after I ate it was almost instantly regretting having it all to myself. Oh, glutony, what a cruel cruel thing.
Anyway, My stomach was feeling super-dooper tight, and was visibly so too because Chris was concerned when he saw it. I went and tried to relieve it by relaxing in the tub for a bit, but that only worked slightly. So then I decided to get up and walk around a bit, you know exercise it off maybe. So I went out and picked up the doggie doo (at 9:30pm). That didn't work either.
That's when I started to notice that I ahdn't felt her move. I mean, I had noticed it at first, but just thought she couldn't because of everything I ate. I went and laid down for a little bit, and still couldn't get her going. Finally I just gave in to my superior worring skills and called the "baby hotline."
The "Baby Hotline" is a special thing I signed up for free of charge with BCBS. They have 24 hour nurses on call for any worries or questions I might have. I asked her what I should do, and she said to drink a lot of water, then go lay on my left side and count her movement. She should move 5-10 times in one hour. Well, she did, but it was barely. So I still worried and didn't get a lot of sleep because I coudln't feel her when I normally could (rolling over, getting up to go pee, etc). So when I got up at 3am and couldn't feel her any more I lay worrying. I woke Chris up and borrowed his iPhone so I could play her music. I played a number of songs, but only got 1 kick... and that worried me a lot because they were songs she usually went crazy on! I voiced my concern, but then went back to sleep because she had kicked.
When I got up this morning for work I was so exhausted. She didn't kick me at all like she normally does early on. So again, I was worried, but figured it was because we were both exhausted. Went to work and she laid low the whole time. When I got home I ate and drank some juice (something the nurse had reccomended last night, but I didn't have any)(the juice is good because of the sugar), then I went and laid down again. Nothing. No movement. LBG was scaring the crap out of me now!
Let's recap: Last night my stomach was feeling super dooper tight, add to that her lack of movement. Then since then I'd started to get cramps that felt like really bad menstrul cramps.
So I decided I'd call my nurse here locally and see if I needed to go in or what. She gave me the same advice "drink lots of liquids, preferably juice, lay down on my left side and count the kicks." There were some mild differences: "I mean, a ton of liquids; like those 42-oz big gulps," and for the kicks "there should be 6-10 per hour," she also added "to maybe have something sugary to eat." So I did. I followed the instructions as best I could. I only had one more juice box, so I didn't drink that. But I did have a miniature Hershey bar from our trick-or-treat stash and two full tall glasses of ice-cold water (I'd read that they respond a bit more if it's really cold). Then I went and laid down. She started kicking right away. I got to six before half an hour. She was doing just fine, she even gave me some weird little movements that are still hard to describe (but I'll try: it's like she adjusted her position, and sat on it).
To conclude, yes, she scared me, but everything's alright. She's up and moving as I type. My stomach hurts off and on, but I'm trying to take it easy and eat a little at a time. Maybe I'm dehydrated?

Heartburn and ankles

So the update is I've had some major heartburn the last few days. It doesn't help that I've had to skip out on my daily dose of cold calcium (aka ice cream) because of the sinus drainage caused the soar throat I had for about a week and a half. The soar throat is gone, but I haven't tempted fate too much, because it still makes me cough a little. So heartburn is flairing up. But is apparently a major symptom of pregnancy that doesn't really go away. Pooh.
Anyway, on to the ankle thing: My ankle has been swollen since almost day one (you know, I've talked about it. Just my right ankle). Yesterday, after Sarah Morris (now Honeycutt)'s wedding my ankle was a major pain in the butt. And just a notice, I did not wear heals, so it wasn't that. I wore really comfortable shoes. Anyway, when I woke up this morning it was throbbing so badly! I don't know what I've done. It wasn't throbbing as much as it was busting at the seams, but it didn't look a bit swollen, it just felt that way. It was so bad I couldn't get back to sleep. I had to get up and walk around a bit to get it to calm down. I don't know what or why it is this way. Yes, I've elevated it, it just makes it hurt worse sometimes. Now that I've been on it a while it's ok, throbbing just a little, but completely ignorably. So I'm going to try and attempt a nap and see what happens from there.

Feeling the Kicks

Today I felt the kicks! On the outside! It felt like bubbles in the bottom of my stomach. So, I put my hand on it, and I could totally feel the kick on my hand! It was so cool! She does it ever so often in little bits, but that time, it totally was her doing her Tia-bow or something cause she was going crazy for a number of minutes. I was actually able to monitor it. I tried to get Chris to come and feel it, but he was in the shower, and I didn't want to move, in case she stopped. By the time he was done with the shower, she was done with her karate practice.
But now she's not doing it for more than one or two kicks at a time. I'm waiting for the next time she goes all crazy kickboxer on me. Hopefully Chris'll be around. We're both looking forward to him getting to feel her. This is such a cool experience, the whole pregnancy thing.

Dr. Apts Times 2

I had two different doctor appointments today, both for the same thing. The first was at the hospital just to do a 30 minute ultrasound. We got two different sonogram pictures from the time there. I'll add them in a little while. They called it an anatomy scan. They took all sorts of measurements, and stuff. And Yes! It's A Girl!!
But they measured height, width, head, body, length, placenta, amniotic sac/fluids, leg bone, heartbeat, etc. She's doing well and fine.
And apparently so am I. That was my second doctor appointment today.
Yesterday, while at work, I was feeling really lightheaded. The last couple of weeks I've been feeling lightheaded off and on. And well, yesterday at work, I slightly fainted. Now before you go getting yourself worried about it. I am just fine, and so is the baby. I wanted to wait to tell anyone, just in case. But everything is fine. The doctor said it's probably my diet. No I'm not anemic, but I should eat more protein. My weight had been the same since I last went in, and I know it's dropped a couple of pounds since I weighed myself a few weeks ago (a week or two after the last checkup).
So to recap: Yes, it's a girl! No, I don't have pictures up yet (my computer is being a butt), I'm fine, have to change my diet a bit, and she's doing great as well. I'll try to keep you better updated as we go. Oh, and the Due Date is: Feb 3rd-ish.

Feeling the Kicks

Alright, so about this time last week, I think I was finally starting to feel the little kick flutters. All I know is that I'm feeling something ever so often. Last week I was pretty sure they were the kicks. But they feel more like a spider crawling in one place really quickly for a brief moment. It's kind of like those creepy crawly feelings you get when you "just know" a bug is crawling on you (even if it isn't). And at first I thought it was just that, until I realized it was localized to my stomach. Now I can't get enough of it! I know I'll be tired of the kicks and all once they really get harder, but for right now, it sort of worries me if I haven't felt them in a while. I'm being a silly new mom-to-be and talking to my stomach, coaxing it to kick me and let me know it's doing well.

Lopsided

Last night was a weird night for me in general. I couldn't get to sleep, my stomach felt so tight! I don't know if I ate too much and couldn't get rid of it, or if it was the baby. Anyway, I finally just went outside with a flashlight and started picking up the dog poo (yes, 10 o'clock at night). But while doing that I noticed that my stomach was lopsided. Now, I've gotten the feeling that it was before, especially when I just get up from sleeping or I'm about to lay down and have to pick a side. But so far it's always just been a feeling. But I think being extra full/tight, last night I was actually able to see it! It was freaky, to say the least. my right side was way bigger than my left, and I was sure it was the baby, but didn't want to push it over or anything like that. The more I think about it the more I realize that that has been the heavier, or "less light" (because I notice the lighter side more when it's the feeling), side more often than not. So, baby's a righty. I think I evened it out durring the night, because by the time I woke up, I couldn't tell anymore. I wonder why they like that side more? Just a general question for the universe.
And this is just general information I thought I should share as my dogs try to catch flies in the last of the summer heat. It's not something people tell you will happen, so it really took me by surprise.
I saw in a movie once where they had to turn the baby around because it was upside-down, and they did it just by pushing it around with their hands. The mother was well into her 8th month, so I don't know if this is really possible or just movie magic. But wouldn't that hurt the baby? I mean, I'm sure that's how they used to do it, but the baby is still developing, does it dent them or something?
Anyway, enough for today. Just thought I'd share that little tid-bit with you.